My mother claims Mother’s Day was invented by greedy greeting card companies. She could be right, but having a day when we honor our mothers is a grand gesture.

Our ideals about motherhood are all over the place, especially in these days of social media where parents create the perfect cake, decorate a color-coordinated room on 50 cents and have time to build custom shoe closets.

Moms shouldn’t worry about what other people think, but it’s not easy to ignore our mothering skills when we feel we’re being compared to the mom down the street who grocery shops in Spandex, cooks organic food, has a job outside the home and still volunteers at the school.

When my boys were young, just getting them to school with matching shoes felt like a major accomplishment.

Instead of living up to some pie-in-the-sky model, it’s reality-check time.

Here’s some friendly advice for moms, and dads too, that will hopefully relieve some of the guilt associated with parenting, the most rewarding non-paying life-long job in the world.

Stretch marks are okay. They never fade, so don’t believe the hype in the back of magazines. Cellulite is also okay, so wear shorts with a swagger in your step.

Being tired is okay. When a mom’s day starts before dawn and includes getting sleepy kids out of bed in the dark, making sure grouchy children are dressed and backpacks and lunches are gathered for school, all before 8 a.m., that’s more work than some people do in a week.

Being cranky is okay. When you’ve been up all night with a teething infant, a child with projectile vomiting or a smart-mouthed teenager who loves sneaking out of the house, it’s okay to be a bit crabby at two in the afternoon.

Having a messy purse is okay. A woman’s banged-up handbag often resembles a five-and-dime store as it serves as a depository for toys, extra diapers, pacifiers and Zip-lock bags of Cheerios, some of which opened in her purse.

Over the years, my purse has been used as a pillow, second base, a booster seat in a restaurant and a door stop. No way I’m paying big bucks for an accessory that does all that.

It’s okay if you’ve forgotten to brush your teeth or your hair in the morning. It’s also okay to tell your child “no,” “your face will freeze like that,” “I said so” and “do I look like I’m kidding.”

On really stressful days, it’s okay to ride home from work with the windows rolled up while you scream at the top of your lungs.

It might not be healthy to eat ice cream straight out of the carton after sounding out every word in “Mr. Popper’s Penguins,” but a parent has to do what a parent has to do.

This year, let’s concentrate on what we should do:  sing and play with our children.

Honor traditions or create new ones for holidays and special occasions.

Make sure our children know they are loved, praised when they do right and enlightened when they do wrong.

They should know how to hold a fork and knife correctly, to chew with their mouths closed and to say “excuse me” when they burp.

They should know how powerful the words “I’m sorry” can be and that one should carry an elderly person’s groceries but not another person’s guilt.

They should know hugs make some of the worst hurts feel better. They learn that lesson when you hug them after a terrible day and when they hug you when you’ve had a rotten day.

They should also know their mother loves them and that they are the last thought she has every night before she goes to sleep.

So here’s to all the sleep-deprived moms and dads with worry lines who not only have stretch marks but knows how to stretch the family’s budget.

Happy Mother’s Day.

You are appreciated and loved.

This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald.