My husband was at a meeting last night, so I volunteered to take the dog on her nightly walkabout. I was talking to my mom on the phone when I grabbed the leash and a flashlight.

The walk was quick since it was so cold. When I headed up the driveway, I started rummaging around in my pocket for my house keys.

The only thing I found was a crumpled gum wrapper.

Then I felt around my neck for the lanyard that has a house key on it.

Nothing.

Because I wasn’t paying attention, I’d forgotten to put the key in my pocket or around my neck.

I remembered we had a key hidden outside, so I used the flashlight to look for the container. It wasn’t in the two spots I remembered, so I texted my husband. He reminded me we’d moved the hidden key last year, and he stayed on the line while I searched.

Piles of mulch had covered the places where he told me to look, and I came up empty handed. Luckily, his meeting was minutes from the house, so he said he’d come home and let me in.

As the dog and I waited in the driveway, I mentally slapped myself on the forehead. Forgetting the key – what a stupid thing to do. Then I started listing all the stupid things I’ve done, going back to high school.

I was painting a blue stripe in my bedroom, holding a can of blue enamel paint in one hand and a paintbrush in the other.

I was standing on an old wooden folding chair and when I moved to reach a corner, the chair collapsed and I spilled the entire can of blue paint all over the carpet.

A few weeks ago, I turned the water on to fill up the kitchen sink. While the water was running, I decided to put some clothes away.

While in our room, I made the bed, totally forgetting the running water. I got back to the kitchen just as the water was reaching the top of the sink.

I did the same thing with the bathtub last year.

Stupid mistakes.

Then again, aren’t all mistakes stupid? That’s why they’re called mistakes, because it’s when something goes wrong that was unexpected.

Still, I beat myself up when I do something dumb, vowing I’ll never make that mistake again. I’ve been successful a few times.

Before keyless entries into vehicles, I used to keep a spare key in a magnetic box under the back bumper of my car. I had another key in my jewelry box and, for good measure, I gave another key to my neighbor.

I never wanted to find myself stranded in a parking lot again with two screaming toddlers and a basket full of groceries while waiting for someone to let me into my mini-van.

There’s a small pink note taped to the dashboard of my car with one word on it – wallet. That’s because I’ve forgotten my wallet more than once and had to come back home for it, leaving my groceries at the checkout.

I’ve gone the whole day with my shirt on backwards and, more than once, have worn my shirt inside out.

I’ve worn a black shoe and a brown shoe because I got dressed in the dark. If they were the same style, I could dismiss the stupid mistake. However, they were totally different styles and I didn’t notice what I’d done until I got to work.

First thing tomorrow, I’m headed to the hardware store to have another spare house key made. Experience tells me this won’t be the last time I’ll lock myself out of the house.

We stupid people know our limitations.

This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald.