Mindless surfing – a way to escape

I’ve been doing a lot of escaping lately. Not by literally going through one of those escape rooms or on an airplane to some exotic location.

My escaping has been through mindless scrolling on the internet.

One of my favorite escapes is the reels and short video option on Facebook. These are mini stories, usually less than two minutes, and the content is probably decided from my past viewing history and some faceless artificial intelligence being in the blogosphere.

Most of the time, the videos on my reel are cute kids. I love watching Frankie and Stevie, two sisters, as they go through life. Frankie’s got a huge vocabulary and her sister’s right behind her.

There’s also quite a few medical videos. I clicked on Dr. Pimple Popper a couple of times, so now I’m offered gross medical procedures from Dr. Karan Raj. I’m sorry I clicked on him and some of the others because now I think there’s at least three undetected major medical issues going on simultaneously in my body.

Craft and home make-over videos show up all the time. The last time I undertook a craft project was when my kids were in elementary school, and that was years ago.

My craft supplies include Elmer’s glue, pom poms, scissors and pieces of felt. Modern home crafters have power saws, electric sanders and all kinds of goop to put on refinished furniture.

A female comic, Leanne Morgan, showed up one day, and I’ve been hooked on her videos. She’s from Tennessee and is over the age of 50. She talks about being low on hormones, the many diets she’s been on and her wild days in the 80s.

She’s coming to the Smart Financial Center in September, but paying $150 for a ticket is a little over my price range. Didn’t those robots see I choose a lot of videos on how to do things on the cheap?

I think I’ve seen every funny clip of “Modern Family” and “Young Sheldon” on that reel option. I cannot resist Gloria, Mitch and Cameron and the best of the best from their time on television. Clips from “The Office” are always entertaining as are classic skits from “The Carol Burnett Show.”

The artificial intelligence genie knows I’ll watch recipes that include dumping bags of Fritos, ground meat and cheese in a slow cooker. I’ll sit there and watch those videos for a half hour, hoping something, anything, will come up that’s healthy, quick and cheap. No luck so far.

There’s two new guys that showed up this week, and I keep clicking on their videos in hopes that they’ll become regulars. One wears a red tie and tries out some of the “hacks” on TikTok, like how to unlock your iPhone. Khaby Lame tries out some of the hacks people post and, without saying a word, sheds light on some of the ridiculous ideas people think are ingenious.

There’s always the down-home advice of influencer Ophelia Nichols, also known as “Mama Tot” who invites people to eat lunch with her while she dispenses words of wisdom. She’s always inspirational and fun.

I’ll watch every hair cut and hair style video that appears on my feed even though I’ve had the same basic hair style for years. I’d never shave my head or spend $500 to have somebody put yellow then purple then blue goop on my hair.

Rosie’s been making me look better than I deserve for three decades and it only takes her an hour to work her magic on my hair.

Housework and dishes can wait because I’ve got a few rabbit holes to disappear down. When I see you in a few hours, I’ll have the answer to whether or not chocolate-covered pickles taste good and the easiest way to cut up a lime.

This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald. 

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