Whenever the Hebert clan gets together, family “remember-when” stories always come up.
I’m guilty of telling stories I think are funny but are often embarrassing to my brothers and sisters.
On a recent Zoom call, one of my siblings joked I had “revisionist history” recall. I was telling a story that didn’t put him in the best light, even though he was only 7 years old when it happened.
I thought a lot about that comment and made myself a promise. From now on, my nieces and nephews, siblings and in-laws will hear stories that spotlight the goodness in our family.
I’ll tell them how their eldest uncle was one of the most respected members on his high school football team despite being one of the smaller players.
He worked his way through dental school with a young family, built a thriving practice and is in the top tier of his profession. He volunteers at his church and is a tireless helper in the community.
Another brother was one of the top geologists in his office before retiring. He taught himself how to play the guitar, and sings and writes beautiful music when he’s not sharing his faith on the radio waves.
Our middle sister had a reputation for taking care of bullies for all of us when we were kids. She still does that but through civic organizations and as the extremely capable person who handles benefits for her company.
For years, her and her husband’s comfortable home has been open to all who need shelter and a home-cooked meal. They are two of the most respected people in their town and in our family.
The little 7-year-old boy grew into a teenager who stepped in as a male role model when my oldest son was a toddler. Whenever I was scared to stay by myself, he came over, often sleeping on the couch, just to keep me company. He fixed my car and did my home repairs when I was a single mom, and he did all that without complaining.
He handles adversity with grace and is admired by his three beautiful daughters, sons-in-law and adorable grandchildren.
One of the stories I told about our youngest sister is when she was 4 years old and my mom wouldn’t make her compete in a beauty pageant because she was shy. My sister would’ve won that contest hands down.
What I need to tell is how she always helps kids be the best they can be, from her own to the hundreds of pre-schoolers she taught to the high-school teens she encourages to find their way in a grown-up world. She’s strong, active in the community and could still win a beauty contest.
Not only is our youngest brother an outstanding and gifted artist, he’s an incredible story-teller with an iron-clad memory about most things, but especially comics. His Nerdmudgeon podcast about the Marvel Cinematic Universe is entertaining and intelligent.
He is a gifted writer and can dance better than John Travolta. He’s compassionate with a quick, sharp, witty sense of humor.
My siblings listen without judging, love without limits and are respected in their families, their fields of work and their communities.
When I tell family stories from now on, I will concentrate on making sure our cousins, nieces and nephews hear the positive accounts. Those endearing tales far outnumber the embarrassing ones.
I’ve learned it’s much better to praise than humiliate. The heart and head thrive when nurtured with love.
This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald.