February is a busy month in our extended family. There are over 10 birthdays in this short month, and another three at the beginning of March.

When there’s seven siblings plus spouses, over 25 nieces and nephews and that many more children of our nieces and nephews, it seems the Heberts are celebrating year round.

But February boasts its own jam-packed month of cake and candles. We loved the major holidays, but birthdays had a special significance because it was the only day of the year that belonged to just us.

We had to share Christmas and Easter with each other. That was fine because we learned to share early on, but my mom always made us feel special on our birthdays.

She let us choose what we wanted for dinner. That might not seem like a big deal, but this was before pizza chains delivered to your front door and restaurants were on every street corner.

Mom worked all day in an office and then came home and made us whatever we wanted on our special day. One of us wanted her spaghetti while another wanted beef stew. She obliged, never complained, and she always baked our favorite cake.

At the time, I didn’t appreciate how hard that must’ve been on my mom, but I appreciate her more and more every year for putting herself second and for making us feel loved and spoiled, if just for one day.

She did have one trick up her sleeve to make life easier, and that was the decorating. My youngest sister’s birthday starts off the parade, so mom decorated early for her special day. The kitchen had crepe paper from one end of the dining area to the other, happy birthday banners on the walls and a pretty tablecloth.

Those decorations stayed up until the end of March.

It might seem odd that someone’s kitchen would be festive for six weeks, but I thought my mom was quite ingenious for making the best use of her time and energy.

I tried to make our sons’ birthdays special, and that was a little harder with our youngest two. Our middle son’s birthday is five days before Christmas and the youngest one’s is on Halloween.

When they got older, we sometimes went roller skating or bowling. But most of their parties were at our house. We usually had a hot-dog roast in the back yard, complete with a campfire, and at least five bags of marshmallows, bags of chocolate and two boxes of graham crackers.

One year we went to a friend’s camp, and the pond had been drained. The boys had tons of fun wallowing around in the mud. I’m not sure their moms were thrilled, but the boys had a blast.

Then there was the year we had 30 first graders over for a pirate party, and the skies opened up to relentless rain. Luckily, we had a big carport, so we played “Walk the Plank” underneath a covering while lightning and thunder reigned.

For our youngest boy, we usually had his party the weekend before Halloween, and we stayed away from costume parties so there was a difference between Halloween and his birthday. Except for the year he was Wolverine, and I don’t think he took that costume off for weeks.

For children, being invited to a birthday party is the highlight of their year. But so many parents these days throw elaborate parties for their youngsters and can only invite three or four guests.That robs other children of the opportunity to feel special by being invited to someone’s home and to someone’s party.

I’d much rather have 30 kids running around in my back yard, eating home-made cupcakes and drinking Kool-Aid than spoil six of them in a pink limousine.

You might be dreading the cleanup, but follow my mom’s lead – leave the decorations up year round and then all you have to do is get the marshmallows, chocolate and graham crackers ready.

After all, children don’t really care about a limousine. They care that they were invited somewhere.

 

This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald.