Just stop it.
Stop it right now.
Those were the direct orders I issued to my two youngest sons whenever they were fighting. Which, when they were growing up, was at least once a day.
The bickering was usually over small things – “he’s staring at me!” to more substantial accusations – “he broke my Wolverine guy!”
After one major dispute, paying for broken staircase spindles and spending a few afternoons sanding, painting and replacing the broken ones pretty much put an end to resolving differences with body slams.
In today’s explosive climate of hate, prejudice and bigotry, perhaps stopping the violence and retaliations could boil down to three simple words – just stop it.
Nancy Reagan tried something simple back in the 1980s in her war against drugs. Her slogan was “just say no.” Even though people laughed, that’s not bad advice.
People will say this idea, too, is naïve, and perhaps it is. But the highfalutin ways of spending billions of dollars in arms to scare others into not bombing a democratic society hasn’t worked.
So maybe we need to try something within our communities, families and in the groups we belong to and get to the root cause of the hatred. Look at the rhetoric being spewed and stop it.
Instead of looking for ways to inflict pain and suffering on innocent people so the “guilty” will pay, why not look for peaceful solutions that, after all the bloodshed, just might work.
Those who wear the uniform, if you know of anyone on the force who targets minorities, tell them to stop judging someone by the color of their skin or their accents because their prejudices are costing innocent lives.
Those who feel they’re being targeted because of the color of their skin – you might be right. But that won’t keep you alive. What will is establishing communications between law enforcement and our neighborhoods so everybody understands we’re all on the same side.
Nobody wants to be robbed.
Nobody wants their car stolen.
Nobody wants their son, daughter, mother or father arrested and sent to jail. Let’s work together to make sure that those who choose to make bad decisions are reprimanded.
Not just those born into poverty.
Not those who put their lives on the line to protect and serve.
Not those whose skin color is different than ours.
People are tired of reading that innocent children, fathers, mothers, teachers, secretaries and laborers were killed because some mentally unstable person decided to show America, France or England a lesson.
Instead of looking for a knee-jerk reaction that causes untold harm and havoc to people who had nothing to do with the carnage, find peaceful ways to establish trust and acceptance between the countries.
Even as I type those words, I have serious doubts we’ll ever find a solution. I never thought my sons would stop fighting, but they eventually did when they understood the word “brother” did not mean “enemy.”
That only came when they decided to look at each other as human beings and potential friends. Older brother learned that younger brother had guitars he could borrow and was willing to run errands for him.
Younger brother learned if he stopped annoying his older brother, he’d be asked to go along on shopping trips and was included on Nintendo game nights.
By getting along, they both benefitted. As a bonus, they didn’t have to put up with their mother breaking up fights, punishing them, yelling at them, threatening them and losing privileges. Life was a lot easier when they learned to get along.
Maybe some basic parenting could work in the real world.
So just stop it.
Stop the bombing, the hating, the retaliation, feeling like you have to live “an eye for an eye” and understand when we all get along, everybody benefits.
Mostly, everybody lives.
This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald.